Panic

Wide awake at 2 am.

Heart pounding

Pounding

Pounding

Pounding




Wide awake. Fearful and yet not really able to pin-point the fear.

Afraid of what?

Fearful of ???

My heart is flying, bouncing.
I can feel every 'whoosh' of my blood as it thunders through my veins.

I am anxious. Unsettled.
I am frightened. My mouth dry, my hands clammy.
It's two am and I am absolutely terrified of ....
Nothing.
Everything.

I hate these rude wake up calls.

These uninvited interruptions to my slumber.

I hate the searching through my mind, the arguments with myself.

I hate wondering where this came from and what it means.
I hate trying to calm myself, to talk sense to myself.

I hate the moment when I realise once again that this is a random, unfounded physical reaction to a surge in Fight Or Flight Adrenaline.

That there is nothing to fear,

Because my heart is still pounding. And I remain hyper alert.

At 2 am.

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